A basket of clothes pins

Since we moved, I am looking for my basket of wooden clothes pins. I looked in all corners of a basement and on the shelves above washer and dryer;searched a bathroom. I even looked in an attic, but the attic turned into a storage. That would mean to move mattresses, broken and empty trunks, portable toilet and who knows what kind junk is there. I know I will keep looking.
I could buy another little, wicker basket (I already bought new wooden pins fifty for $1.00 at Family Dollar store), but I want my old basket of clothes pegs. I want, I want, I want.
I moved a lot past ten years and everywhere I went the basket traveled with me and somehow it didn't get lost in moving process. What the basket full of old wooden pegs means to me? A wish I'll have my clothes line back, where I can hang freshly washed laundry, sorted by size, color and by assortment of garments. I always hang the same socks together, otherwise the line looks untidy. Our washer produces nice, clean laundry. The Sun is shining in this beautiful Spring morning. It is a perfect day for hanging laundry outside. Later during the day I'll go out to collect dry laundry. Tonight we are going to sleep well in fresh, clean bed sheets dried by Sun and a little breeze.
When we went on a trip to Philadelphia I noticed many statues, but I stood a long time in front of a giant clothes peg - a symbol of Monday morning fresh washed laundry.

Copyright (c) Marie Neumann
Pottsville, 4/30/2012

Chicken is falling

Chicken is falling down from a sky. Catch it, William, bake it and eat it. Meanwhile you can think why chickens are falling down from the sky. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 4/27/2011

A toy

I have a sawdust in my head. I am a toy. Hands and legs made of rugs are on the strings. The legs shuffle and arms move trying to catch a bowl, a butterfly - never catching anything. The hands clasp handful of air. Relax, relax. Mouth is moving. I don't hear a sound. Hearing is shutting off. Suddenly I can not talk. It doesn't make any sense. It's senseless. Strings hang from the hook. Puppets are sleeping until next show. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville,4/2/2012

A trip

Did you polish your shoes? See, how brown is becoming to you. Did you wash your ears? You can hear much better in clean ears. Did you wash your dungarees? Calico cat slept on them. Do you have gas in your car? You don't need any. Don't travel anywhere. It's raining outside, stay rather at home. You could catch a cold. Meanwhile the road, which leads to our town, closed down. You would have to take a detour, there is no other road. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 2/7/2012

Cherries

Lets get cherries. Where do you have them? In the store. How much do they cost? You have to pay in dollars. How much? How much do you have? Cherries in the hands, stones on the plate. What else? You don't know anything anymore. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, ca 2010

Toilet

Our downstairs toilet can not take my s... . It sits in a band, blocks a plumbing and overflows with water every time, when somebody flushes. A plunger made my hands blister. Drano, a liquid plumber, or other liquids do not work. The toilet is useless. I'll put a flower pot with geranium on the top and run to use another toilet upstairs. When that one blocks ... May I come to your house instead? Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 2/15/2012

Betsie and chicken

It was the Christmas Holiday. I bought myself two CD's as a Christmas present, some dog and cat food, and balls for the animals to chase. I didn't get a Christmas tree this year. My new neighbors were eavesdropping, so I didn't like my place much. I listened to loud Spanish music on my radio. I made a potato salad and baked a chicken. I cut few slices, left the chicken on a counter, turned around to get something and heard "crunch". I turned back and the chicken wasn't on the counter anymore. The bitch pretended she doesn't know anything. About an hour later she began to have a diarrhea. It was Christmas, everything was closed and I didn't want her to dirty my carpet, so I took her outside, lengthened a chain with a rope and tied the rope high on a tree branch, so she couldn't reach the rope. Time from time I looked out of a kitchen window to see what she was doing. She had diarrhea and glared at me. I went to do something in the bedroom. I don't have to tell anybody I went to take a nap. When I woke up I went to look out of the window and there, on the grass, was only a chain and a rope left! The rope was untied. So I called, whistled, walked thorough a neighborhood but my messed up bitch was nowhere to be seen. I made a phone call to the animal shelter. No one picked the phone. Of course, it was Holiday. I knew somebody has to be there to clean and feed the animals. So I left my name, phone number, description of the dog and a message on the answering machine: In a case you have my dog keep an eye on her. She gobbled up whole chicken and has diarrhea. I stopped at animal shelter first thing on Monday. They had read the message. They had my dog. She had bloody diarrhea and there was nothing to push out. I paid $30.00 for dog sitting and took Betsie to a vet. They asked me, if they can provide x-ray. "Of course." They kept her for three days. After three days she was all right and didn't talk to me. When I went to pick her up, she pretended she has never seen me before. It was she who gobbled up whole chicken, not I. I paid $300.00 bill and took the dog home. For $300.00 I could buy one hundred chickens and do not leave a single one on the counter.
The bitch began to talk to me again like nothing happened. I was somewhat disappointed. I completely forgot about my neighbors and Christmas. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 2/19/2009

Depression

Lurking from TV ads, sitting in all corners of a dark, empty house. Depression is surrounding a bed. It is so hard to wake up, open eyes, and get out off the bed. On the bed stand is bottles' collection of pills: to fight depression, to cure depression ... Why did you let it go so far? Not even a best psychiatrist can not cure your depression. What happened to run, or fight to survive? What happened to will to live? What happened to healthy appetite? Eliminate a word depression and replace it with: I am not in mood, don't feel like to, and I am pissed off. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 4/21/2012

Animal Kingdom

Where is it? I may guess. Africa. Safari. Controlled water holes. Did we count them all? Yes, we shoot deer. We eat its meat. Besides, I don't want to have contact with one crossing road in the night. This is why I don't like to drive in the dark. Where is it? In the air? Flying ducks following their route. It was an airplane crossing their way. Many duck casualties and one crippled plane was the result. Where is it? Definitely in the jungle. Attacking insect and variety of hungry snakes. Where is it? In the water. We don't have much control over ocean life. We fish them, we eat them. But control them? No. Animal Kingdoms are in oceans, where they are free to hunt, to eat ... In deep ocean, I mean. Who is the King, or a Queen? The biggest? Why were they swimming to California coast to die there? Who, or what was chasing them? I do not know. Copyright (c) Marie Neumann Pottsville, 4/21/2012

New bull 4

After forty days the thunderstorm arrived with torrents of rain. Water filled water holes, dry seasonal creek over flooded and grass turned green almost overnight. In this time the farmer took the young cattle to new pastures and bought a new Holstein bull. During the winter Stracena was very busy. She grazed and ate, ate and grazed. In the Spring time she had a calf. A little Holstein bull. Malena didn't like a bull. She liked Stracena. She turned into fine, tasty beef.
Somebody gave the farmer an ox. From the luck of better housing, the farmer kept the ox with rest of the herd. The ox was calm, quiet and preferred grazing over other activities. Then the herd began to run around, jump over the barbed wires and some of the cows got into the neighbor's rye. "It is the ox who is leading them," said the farmer's wife. "Oh no," replied the farmer. "It is the biggest cow." The beef from the big cow lasted for two months. It fed whole family.
Stracena's little bull was frolicking, kicking his hooves in the air. He was very happy little bull. "It is shame, such a pretty bull has to go to the butcher," said a farmer's daughter with a pity. "It is a happy bull. He will give a good beef. It will not taste like the old neurotic hen we had for dinner last Sunday. Our cattle are happy, and this is why we sell such good beef everybody like to buy from us." The farmer walked outside to lit his pipe and on his way pushed away another hysterical chicken. He liked cattle. The chickens belonged to his wife.

Copyright (c) Marie Neumann
Written in Czech, Summer 2011
Translated 4/9/2012,
with English corrections
by Henry Dallimore,
Pottsville

New bull 3

Drought came. The ground was dry and cracking up. The cows were licking dew from grass in the morning and at nine o'clock crowded around and in water hole to cool off at least a little bit their legs. The water in the hole was low, changed into the mud and then even the mud dried out. Grass turned yellow end emitted crackling sound. There were days, when a hot wind was blowing, throwing hot sand and dust into the eyes. The cows laid down tiredly in the shadow of the trees. They couldn't breath well and began to loose weight.
The farmer liked his herd. It was nice herd. He already counted how much he will get for young bulls and was dreaming about purchasing the neighboring pastures.
The desperate farmer was leaving in the middle of the night with a trailer to buy hay. He drove as far as Nebraska. He brought hay once, twice - then the slaughtering started. He had to slaughter about a half of his herd. First the young bulls and then the old pieces. The heifers and their mothers survived. The heifers were not thinking about stupidities anymore. They laid under the tries, or were trying to eat dry, yellow grass, which was hurting their mouths. The drought lasted for forty days.

To be continued

New bull 2

"I can not wait, when they will join a new herd with a new bull. They are only trouble." "Did they get him?" "A farmer left this morning for an auction. He wants a Holstein bull. It looks like he is bringing one." "Stracena would like to have a black and white calf." "Nonsense. She will accept what is available and she will be happy with it."
Night dew and coyotes cries woke up both heifers. "I have a headache." "I am thirsty." All herd sleeps when they walk to the water hole. They take a long drink. Malena throws up. "I feel sick." "Lie down." "I am sick even when I lie down. We shouldn't eat it." "I have had beautiful dreams after eating that grass." "What kind dreams?" "I was singing in opera. You didn't have any?" "I did. I had a calf. It was black and white, and it was a little bull. I have showed him the grass we ate and told him he can not touch it. He listened. He was the good, little bull." And after a while: "Do you feel better?" "A little bit. Lets sleep."
All the herd sleeps. The coyotes cry not far away and a cowboy on a horse is circling the herd. Both heifers are dreaming about a new bull.
Those were the last carefree days of Malena and Stracena for long time. The farmer didn't bring a new bull from the auction.

To be continued.

New bull

Two heifers are holding a conversation at a pasture. "It's boring here today." "Did you go to look and count the cars?" "Yes, I did. I stood by barbed wire for at least one hour and in that time there was only one old coughing clunker passing by. What are we going to do?" "I have an idea. Watch out! Graze! Your mother is looking our way." "Do you want to talk about bulls?" "Phleese! Here is only one and he is our father." "Lets go and irritate him." The heifers walk slowly by the bull, but he doesn't pay them any attention. They give another try. This time they are passing so close by, that Stracena brushes his nose ring with her tail. The bull gives out a low bellow. In the moment one of the mothers is there and chases the heifers away. "Where did you get an idea to irritate the bull?" "Did you notice what he has under his tail?" Both heifers choke on the grass and immediately hear loud warning from both mothers cows. "Mother, are we getting a new bull? This one is our father and besides he also looks old." "I heard you will be going to new herd with a younger bull." "What color he will be?" "Oh, I would like to have a black and white calf." "Heifers, do not talk nonsense and graze." "Hey you, Malena!" "What?" "Did you ever go to those little bushes on the far end of the pasture?" "Nope. Why?" "An aromatic grass grows there. You get dizzy, when you swallow it."
The heifers move slowly toward the bushes, so they will not alert mothers. They graze the aromatic grass. After a while they begin to jump up and down and dance in the circle. They try to jump over the bushes. "What are they having there?" "I hope they didn't catch a bot fly?" Both mothers quickly run to heifers and chase them away from the bushes. Both heifers stagger, with hanging heads and protruding tongues, and legs giving way. Finally they fall and sleep. The mothers sigh deeply and let them sleep.

To be continued.